NO VOTE, NO PROBLEM, UNTIL IT IS

In the warmth of August at the spry age of six, I boarded the first flight of my life. And I was excited. We were going to America, where I would see the Statue of Liberty out of my window and cross paths daily with celebrities. Wow, America, my friends said. So cool!

Them chompers though.

What felt like half a day later, falling asleep on luggage carts and hoping my ears would pop, we touched down in Portland, Oregon, which is not at all where one would see the Statue of Liberty or run into celebrities. Still, I was in love. Our back garden was massive. Our house had THREE bathrooms- count it, three. I ran around the place rabidly. It was like a castle compared to our old home in Horsell, England, and here I had my very own room. Sans furniture, of course; we had to wait for that to arrive. But, a room complete with a bear-shaped sleeping bag and a Beanie Baby, which is all you really need at that age.

Sixteen years later, on an uneventful Thursday night, I sat on my living room floor and plugged in my headphones to stream the GOP debate. I don’t know why I cared. I’d lived in this country for almost ¾ of my life, and yet applying for citizenship was a task to be completed. The whole process takes months and money, and so I’d been putting it off until later. My permanent residency, secured by my father’s work, didn’t expire until I was 25, and I always thought I’d be married or figured it out by then anyways. Now I’m leaning more towards the figuring it out and less towards the marriage. And citizenship is gradually becoming a priority in my life each day as I begin to form more and more of a political opinion.

Photo by Let Your Voice Be Heard

Before it was almost laziness on my part. I didn’t have to take a stance in anything or clash with anyone because I legally couldn’t do anything about it. And if you don’t vote, what gives you the right to complain? I felt an overwhelming sense of relief to be apathetic and unparticipatory. Sure, there are some obstacles I faced: certain scholarships, opportunities, jobs I couldn’t apply for, things like that. On campus I would get voting enthusiasts thrusting ballots into my face and have to kindly explain to their confused faces that I couldn’t vote because I wasn’t a citizen. “You’re on your way to becoming one though, right?” one man said to me. I wasn’t sure if I was. By being exempt from voting, I was removing myself from the current crisis of our country, washing my hands of it. Wish I could help, but I can’t vote, you see. It wasn’t really my country. I never did get into the patriotism. Still don’t know the words to any of those iconic songs. But I’d be lying if I said I understood British politics any better. I try to keep up, I really do, but my most recent visit to the motherland revealed I was far removed from the culture where I felt so at home once upon a time. When I came to the United States, I entered a classroom of people who spoke differently than me, who thought I was strange but mostly fascinating. And then, like all children do, I adapted, and quickly dissolved into the crowd. And now, when I go back to the United Kingdom, people hear my accent and it’s not quite right. My expressions, mannerisms, and pronunciations are all wrong, and I don’t belong. What is home now?

As I contemplated this weird existentialism, I realized that far more issues in the place I grew up mattered to me, and I was denying myself the right to a voice. Things I felt deeply passionate about like women's and LBGTQ rights were being challenged in forums right before my eyes, and I didn’t want to feel distant and useless anymore. Another revelation struck me; here I was, not taking advantage of my privilege to potentially apply for citizenship, quite easily. So many people struggle everyday to have the opportunity I have and I was squandering that. The more I read, the more I regretted not becoming involved. I’m not even sure if I can legally sign a petition. But I want to step up and have a purpose.

So. Even though presidential elections are kinda bogus, it’s my goal to become a citizen before November of 2016. Wish me luck ‘Merica.

Epic photo by the Roosevelts